you're not alone
by Xephonia
Summary: Kaito feels numb. There's someone who doesn't want him to feel that way.


Kaito is never truly alone.

(Although not so long ago, he was.)

By that he doesn't mean Galaxy-Eyes Cipher Dragon.

(Galaxy-Eyes _is_ him.)

He doesn't mean his comrades either.

(They're all gone.)

There's someone who's always with him, reliable in a strange way that only he would understand.

Another him.

They have the same name, their looks are very similar, but Kaito still acknowledges _Kaito_ as a different person, because _Kaito_ has different memories and different friends and a different story.

 _Kaito_ wears the same clothes as Kaito, but his coat is white and he doesn't have a Resistance scarf. _Kaito_ has one red eye and a blue marking around it.

(Kaito once asked why, but _Kaito_ said it had something to do with Numbers Hunting. Kaito doesn't know what Numbers are, but he thinks the details aren't all that important.)

Kaito isn't sure of what he should think of _Kaito_. At first he thought he might just be hallucinating, but _Kaito_ said he's here to help fix things.

 _Kaito_ never said what he was here to fix though. _Kaito_ never explained why he isn't tangible or why only Kaito can see him, either.

Usually, Kaito doesn't trust strangers or... anyone, really. But Kaito trusts himself, and that's why he trusts _Kaito_ , even if _Kaito_ isn't really him.

* * *

Ever since _Kaito_ 's first appearance, Kaito can actually sleep again. He dreams of people he doesn't know, people he enjoys being with; he wonders if those are _Kaito_ 's memories.

So one day, he asks.

" _Kaito_."

"Yeah?"

"I keep dreaming of two boys. Yuuma and Ryouga. Are they your—"

"Yeah."

 _Kaito_ looks sad this time, and it's the first time Kaito has seen this expression on him.

Usually, _Kaito_ is like an older and stronger him, like he's seen the worst and nothing can surprise him, yet he's somehow never lost himself.

(Kaito almost envies _Kaito_ for that. Almost. Mostly _Kaito_ just pisses Kaito off for seemingly being incapable of answering questions properly.)

"Are you from the future?"

 _Kaito_ crosses his arms. "You won't get to meet Yuuma in the future, if you mean that."

Kaito wants to protest and say that's not what he meant.

(But that's exactly what it is.)

He mimics his other self's pose now. "That doesn't answer my question though."

"I'm not from the future. I said, I'm here to make sure you don't screw up more than what you have already."

"What do you mean by—"

"You didn't protect Haruto."

Kaito wants to say something, but the disappointment in _Kaito_ 's gaze— and his own disappointment in himself— weighs hard on him, and he gets up to hunt some Academia members.

* * *

Sometimes, _Kaito_ hums a melody. Kaito thinks he should know it, but he doesn't; yet it always calms him and makes him feel at ease.

Sometimes, Kaito wishes that _Kaito_ had been there before; when Kaito felt sick and nauseous after every single Academia member he turned into a card, when Kaito hated himself and everything— when Kaito still felt things at all.

Sometimes, Kaito just wants everything to end.

(He remembers Yuuma's smile from his dreams. It feels reassuring.)

"...Kaitobingu."

"Oh?" _Kaito_ actually smiles. It's rare, but usually connected to Haruto or Yuuma. "Yeah, he told me that."

"He wouldn't say that if he had seen this."

"I'm sure he would."

"You're optimistic."

"I used to be a lot like you."

Kaito wonders if that means that thanks to Yuuma, _Kaito_ is not like him anymore.

Kaito thinks that these friendships will make _Kaito_ weak one day.

Kaito wonders if weakness is better than numbness.

He can't tell.

* * *

Kaito did not know that _Kaito_ can actually touch with him.

(But here they are, with _Kaito_ preventing Kaito from turning Shun into a card.)

"You're pathetic," _Kaito_ hisses, and he drags Kaito along.

(Kaito is glad that the others don't notice him being dragged away by an invisible force.)

* * *

When they reach the broken heart of what used to be Heartland Tower, the first thing _Kaito_ does is to slap his other self.

Kaito doesn't budge. "What was that for?"

"You're behaving like you're Ryouga and it's just annoying at this point."

(Kaito vaguely recalls dreams involving him finding out that Ryouga— Nasch— had killed IV.)

"Stop bugging me."

 _Kaito_ sighs exasperatedly. "Fine, do I have to duel you so you stop this and listen?"

"If you want to lose, sure. Are you ready for your repentance?"

* * *

It turns out that _Kaito_ is the better duelist, much to Kaito's surprise.

So as Kaito lies on the ground, defeated, _Kaito_ approaches him and pulls him to his feet. "What would turning Shun into a card accomplish?"

"He was getting in the way."

"He hates Academia. You hate Academia. If you had carded Shun, you'd have done Academia a favour. You'd have killed the only permanently tangible person who truly cares about you, and most importantly—"

"—wait, 'permanently tangible'? Does that mean you actually—" Kaito's eyes widen.

 _Kaito_ scowls. "—and most importantly, let me ask you a thing. Would it bring Haruto back?"

There's silence after that.

"Haruto doesn't come back no matter what I do. So what does it matter if I take revenge?"

"Shun didn't do anything to you except for being ineffective in this war. Besides. Do you have definite proof that the carding can't be reversed? Aren't you supposed to be a scientist?"

Kaito looks at the destroyed buildings behind _Kaito_ , unable to look him in the eye. "My lab got destroyed."

"Then rebuild it."

"Somehow I feel like that's something Yuuma would say."

"You're not wrong."

* * *

That night, Kaito dreams of the moon.

The moon and Numbers and Mizael and Galaxy-Eyes and death.

(And Yuuma.)

"You're dead, aren't you?" Kaito mutters when he wakes up to see _Kaito_ looking up at the moon.

 _Kaito_ nods. "I might not stay dead, though."

This time, Kaito doesn't question it.

* * *

"Why do you insist that I should help Yuuya?"

"The odds of you finding a way to save Haruto are higher if you help them find a way out of here first. Besides, you need company who isn't me."

"I'd prefer Yuuma and Ryouga—"

"Who wouldn't? But they aren't here and they aren't your friends to begin with. But Shun is your friend and he's also Yuuya's friend. So get over with it and save those morons."

* * *

Summon chants are a personal thing. You write them in the evenings, improve them constantly; write them so they reflect what you are trying to convey with your duel.

Galaxy-Eyes Cipher Dragon's summon chant is the embodiment of Kaito's hatred and his desire for revenge.

(It's the embodiment of his loneliness.)

He'd scribbled the chant down in messy handwriting on the day on which he lost Haruto. It was like an oath to take revenge and to never feel a bond again.

But here he is, rewriting Neo Galaxy-Eyes' summon chant, and somehow he thinks that _Kaito_ would've written a similar chant.

(Probably Yuuma would've, too.)

 _Kaito_ has been around less lately, almost like he's satisfied now that Kaito works together with Yuuya and Shun.

"You're rewriting it?"

Right when I thought of him, huh?, Kaito thinks and he nods.

"I might not stay for much longer."

"You did say you might not stay dead."

"Yeah. You better save Haruto even when I'm gone."

Somehow, Kaito feels sad. He's not sure why.

* * *

If Kaito hated _Kaito_ 's self-satisfied smirk before, then that was nothing compared to the hatred he feels for everything Dennis does right now.

"My turn! Draw!"

Little Fairy.

Kaito glances at his other self, and there's a nod— Kaito thinks it's reassuring.

 _Kaito_ 's fingers touch Kaito's as he takes his turn and there it is again—

a feeling of comradery, like maybe Kaito isn't alone, maybe _Kaito_ is there and perhaps Shun is there and Sayaka and Allen and

(Maybe Yuuma is watching over them.)

—maybe Kaito was never alone to begin with.

"I suppose that means you learnt it." There it is again, _Kaito_ 's smirk, but Kaito isn't mad because yeah, he's learnt it.

Before Kaito can open his mouth, _Kaito_ goes on, "It's time to go then."

Time stops.

"You're not really gonna go now, are you?"

"Gonna miss me?"

"Not a chance."

"Don't screw up." _Kaito_ pats Kaito's head, and there's a strange gentleness in gaze, it kind of reminds Kaito of the way he himself looks at Haruto, and he wonders this means that _Kaito_ genuinely cares about him.

* * *

It's the first night of peace, Kaito is walking through the ruins.

Haruto's sleeping already, so it's like one of those nights a few months ago, just a lot more quiet.

(Maybe a bit lonely without someone who annoys him.)

Kaito looks at the destroyed heart of Heartland tower and smiles slightly.

It'll take a while to rebuild everything, but it'll be worth it.

Isn't that right, _Kaito_?, he thinks, and then he hears an answer.

"So you didn't screw up." _Kaito_ is standing there with his arms crossed, and he's smirking.

Kaito thinks it might even be a smile.

(Kaito doesn't know if _Kaito_ is an illusion or actually there, but _Kaito_ 's whole presence so far had been a thing of impossibility to begin with, so he doesn't question it all too much.)

"Well, kinda."

"Good job."

This time, _Kaito_ is definitely smiling.


End file.
